Wednesday, February 18, 2009

The Strutting Duck: I came. I saw. I conquered. Part 1


So, I just got a facebook message from "The Strutting Duck" informing me of a bluegrass music festival happening at the beginning of March. Even though I am SUPER-STOKED about this event, for oh-so-many reasons...it is not the reason for this blog. For those of you who don't know...(I like to pretend that people that don't know me actually find my blog interesting)...ok, so for those of you who don't know, The Strutting Duck is what I would call the perfect description of a "dive bar," located in Auburn, AL. It is a place that is very near and dear to my heart, not only because of the memories that will last a lifetime, the friends that were made, or the nights I can't remember, but also because of (excuse my language please, there is no other way to say this) the funny-ass shit that happens there....and more than likely, nowhere else. I am going to use this blog as a tribute to some, but not nearly all, of the funny-ass shit that I have experienced at the Strutting Duck. Enjoy

*line dancin', high-waisted wrangler wearin', tobaccer spittin', ....WOMEN...and the wasted frat boys that are hittin' on 'em.
*girls dancing as if they were strippers to the song "I'd love to lay you down" by Conway Twitty and couples dancing/dry-humping to the song "Dust on the Bottle" by David Lee Murphy. This does not necessarily mean that they were drunk. Obviously, they just missed a very important turn on their way to Twisters or the back room at Sky Bar.
*one time I actually witnessed what had to have been the Auburn Highschool Prom afterparty take over the entire bar. It was one of the most hilarious, but also brutally awkward moments in my "Duck" history....possibly my life.
*hands down, everytime I went to "the duck" I could pretty much assure you that the most redneck, unfortunate-looking, country-bumpkin male in the entire bar would, at some point during the night, approach me and ask me to dance....repeatedly. This never happened with any of the scarse amount of good-looking guys in the bar. Ever. Unless they were my friends. haha
*I could also rest assured that at some point in the night I would get to witness my bestie Leanne "put that b**ch in her place" for trying to steal her spot on the front row. Sometimes I was scared, and sometimes almost peed my pants from laughing so hard. Good times though.
*And one time there was this really hyper girl, and me and my friend Ryan watched her for hours. Not gonna go into it, cause I'm pretty sure you had to be there, but I think Ryan thought she was hot.
*Of course there were always the "line-dancing girls" who everyone would make room for so that they could watch them turn what is supposed to be the "Watermelon Crawl" into a rendition of the routine from the Pussycat Dolls video "Don't Cha." Classic. I'm pretty sure that was when me and Leanne decided that we wanted to take hip-hop dance classes. We were gonna show those bitches up....not that it would've been hard.

Well that was my stroll down Strutting Duck memory lane...to be continued. Hope you enjoyed.

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